It's natural to take one look at the destroyed slippers/novel/Alienware workstation and start yelling over and over again that the guilty party is, in fact, a Bad Dog. Twitter. [Tweet “Defensive learning leads to dogs lashing out and causing harm. See Thoughts on Force Training from a Dog Trainer below. But it's particularly upsetting when it's your own dog that bit you. This is my dog of nearly 4 years, a dog that would come to meet me … In my home, I’m top dog. Did he understand? For more details, visit the Affiliate Disclosure page. Thank you for sharing it with me. 0 Recommendations. Anyway, it slipped and I think it hit a nerve, he started freaking out and running all over the house. I focused on trying to train her to be more calm, so there wouldn’t be a repeat bite. He has a podcast too. I know she still loves me but is absolutely terrified of me. i didnt use violence. Allow Them To Shape Your Relationship. first: and this happens the least, if he’s in love with you, if he’s in a relationship with you and you hurt his feelings, he … Mutual preening is an important part of a parrot’s relationship with other birds. Even bought a … read more. I know he enjoyed it. When my pup has the choice between hanging out with me or doing pretty much anything else, she chooses me. And I admire all the dedication you’ve put in to continually learning about dog behavior – it really makes training easier when you understand the “why” rather than just the “how.”. Click on the categories above. One afternoon he was loose in the backyard with Doug. These injection tips are definitely a pet owner’s lifesaver. I wish all dog owners would accept this; I truly find it disturbing and heart breaking that a dog is out there fearing their owner. She's great!" I just wanted to share my opinion and my experience based on what I’ve learned from dog trainers I respect and raising our dogs. The dogs were allowed rawhide chews back then because they needed something to curb their chewing drive and I couldn’t find anything else that was affordable that lasted longer than 10 minutes. The agent in onions that is toxic to dogs is known as N-propyl disulfide or thiosulfate. Dr Joi, I appreciate your comments. She took one ride with my daughter to puppy play last year and came home very upset and now she shakes, cries and get very upset car riding. She jumped into the water and swam her heart out. My dog don’t act right eather. I’m so glad that positive training is much more widely used these days. When Rodrigo Lunges at Cyclists: Rodrigo is a Border Collie / Blue Heeler mix; his herding instincts when it comes to cyclists are too strong for me to train away. I go for long walks on my own when I’m having a rough day. For now I shall type this as penance and continue to feel bad for my hasty reaction. It can cause sedation and grogginess in some dogs though which may be the change in behavior. It felt great! One of the dogs greets me at the front door, but scampers away from me at the back door because the back yard is where he does most of his damage. Thank you for your question. Dogs can actually get sick from both raw and cooked onions. I once swatted Faolan’s nose out of frustration, and felt broken inside afterwards. He hit the hardwood floor in my kitchen very hard and was paralyzed for 20 minutes. He has 8 dog beds and does not use them other then to sit down in them when he refuses to sit on the floor. He still gets excited when he sees them and barks, but it no longer interrupts our walk. I only wanted to bring more life into my home, to have some jogging partners, some puppies to grow up with my toddlers. So we all can make mistakes, but I don’t see any reason for repeatedly lashing out at a creature that loves you. A change in behavior can also be due to a health issue. I, Kimberly Gauthier (owner), am a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. The current was so strong we would only have the second we were passing her. She is a loving dog and tries very hard to make me happy, even if she is a bit difficult. It's been 2 days now and he is still behaving like this. If you have an issue that requires immediate (or faster) resolution, I highly encourage you to reach out to a reputable, positive based dog trainer. He was so open. (she had bonded with me right away) Now that she has warmed up to me, my husband, and my daughter, she is still very nervous around my 16 yr old son. Here’s more details: https://keepthetailwagging.com/communicating-with-a-reactive-dog-woowooweek/. After crying out in pain, he slinked away and wouldn't come to me when I called him. There are always going to be times when our dogs drive me nuts with their behavior, but it’s so important that I remember that they’re doing what comes natural to them. A dog’s change in personality could be due to stress or health. I did protect them when they were puppies by removing them from the situation and now that Scout and Zoey are adults, they can hold their own. If a dog's personality shifts – take notice and take notes, then all your veterinarian immediately! My husband felt he was pushed into having a dog and was always a tension about the cost of treatments and the impact on the family. He could have got away any time he wanted. We have good stretches in between, but sometimes I just lose it and those moments might be starting to define our relationship. I have a 1 year old Pit Bull, who is very well mannered and very family friendly. I am female and would just lay on my back with my legs spread wide open. But I didn't call her a bad name or hit her. When I switched our dogs to a species appropriate diet of raw food, I noticed a change in Rodrigo's behavior. He is currently on heartworm treatment because he was positive on a heartworm test. In Dec. Unfortunately, I’m not a dog trainer, but a great trainer to follow who may have an answer is Fernando Camacho; check out his Facebook group. Rodrigo stopped racing towards the trail in less than a week. I would never strike my dogs, just as I would never strike a child. I know there’s still some old school trainers out there that like to use force and hopefully the continued education about dogs emotional responses and learning abilities quash it. If you’re not in a place where you can give love, then help your dog to find a home where she can get the love she deserves. ~ Damien Sanchez #keepthetailwagging]. She stumbled a few steps and lie down. I was upset, but stayed calm and respectful during the entire incident. I also try not to judge how others choose to train their animals, but it is hard. One thing I’ve noticed in your story is that you didn’t seek help from a dog trainer or take your dog to the veterinarian. My mother allows him to bite, growl, lunge, and run after people (small children included) and almost got hit by a car four times, and has gotten kicked and nearly pepper sprayed because of this behavior. However, I’m still nervous that she is now going to “hate” or “fear” me forever. But he moved, and my foot nipped his nose, and he dropped the ball, and I was in sheer shock that it happened, and I began telling him sorry, and he shut his eyes and submitted to me! Just like it can calm our dogs down; it helps us too. It’s not easy caring for dogs, because we speak and entirely different language. After about an hour, he was back to normal. An example: Removing a stimulus that the dog dislikes, like the mailman. But there killing my younger Sister s dog. He started off slowly, and I let him. It takes consistency and confidence to raise well-behaved dogs. Your puppy is a baby. I’ve done everything from ignoring it to scolding to submitting. I was easily able to get him to calm down and he gave her cuddles instead of lashing out, but if a person who never physically corrects their dog can react that way under stress, how will a person who does use that method react? You don’t hurt anyone or anything just because they accidentally injured you or made you mad. You rock! Consider a friendly dog whose being walked on a prong collar. It puts the animal, child, employee in survival mode. I sat on the floor with him on my lap still in the towel and slowed down my energy and started scratching his head. Not that I grew up in an abusive household but I did grow up in one where spanking or swatting a dog for something they did was “bad” such as when they peed in the house – swatting them on the rump then rubbing their nose in it (HUH?) As an owner, you wouldn’t do anything to hurt your dog intentionally. He becomes reactive out of fear and anticipation of pain, whenever he sees another dog. The idea of seeing someone attacking their dog to get them to behave makes me sick in my heart. But I feel like my patience has been so warn by this and the damage I have caused is irreparable. Animals, children, as well as adults, connect [that] good things happen when you do good things. I hope he … And, ask yourself, do you want your dog to obey you out of fear? Again, I don't get angry. Would it be the cause of the aggression? Thank you!!! Dogs and cats aren't big on specific traumatic memories unless they're really dangerous or reinforced (if you amputated a pet's paw yourself, it might learn to be afraid of you, or if there's one person in the house who's consistently cruel to the pet… There can be an adjustment period for both dogs and humans, so remind yourself that sometimes when you may think "My dog doesn't like me," he's really just taking time to get to know you. I think it is quite possible if your sister accidentally stepped on him that she is not his favorite, yes. However, if he frequently consumes onions it can lead to health issues. I was able to keep my cool because I didn't want to practice negative reinforcement training, which means using punishment to discourage “bad” behavior. Thanks for sharing your story. by Kimberly | Oct 15, 2014 | Raising Dogs | 32 comments. It may just be a one-time thing — you moved toward the dog too quickly, or sat too close to him while he was … She often will jump up and lick my face in excitement, and I don’t know why teeth ended up involved this time, but I know it wasn’t aggression. My heart is breaking right now. Rodrigo is our alpha dog and continues to bully the other dogs and it’s painful at times because I want to make him stop. I don’t hate you or your comment. She is usually very energetic and playful but now all she wants to do is sun herself. Continuing with my story, the front desk employees at the vet’s office were now watching the situation, and the veterinarian had just walked out as I leaned forward to make sure my … You’re gonna hate this comment or me. Hello, my dog to me is TOO spoiled! She jumped up when excited and bit my face (she’s a big and athletic dog.) Sept. 28, 2020. "Alisha is great, she's really helped me through this tough time in my life and with my anger issues. He hit the hardwood floor in my kitchen very hard and was paralyzed for 20 minutes. I wish you would have said what to do instead in those circumstances. It’s never too late. We’ve all made mistakes when it comes to our pets – being honest about it takes courage. I learned it was MY RESPONSIBILITY to change this – my fence is now reinforced every few inches with rebar weaved through the fence and pounded into the ground. He just doesn’t get it! Then please seek counseling to help you work through your emotional issues. Last spring, I decided to train him to do something different. Your dog doesn't react, because he thinks the narcissist cares for him, the same way that you do. This makes sense when you consider how dogs learn. I would never, ever, ever, hurt him. Whenever I was sad he would come over and distract me from it. All puppies do this. If I tap my dog on the nose with 1 finger when I'm mad and he knows he did something wrong, he acts like I just smashed a baseball bat into his face and like I'm going to follow it up by taking him to my torture dungeon for a few weeks. I have literally cleaned up pee every single day for more than 8 weeks in my house and I’m at my wits end. After this outcome repeats several times, the once friendly prong collar dog learns that other dogs cause pain. I want my Lilo back. When you hear that Beagles need a FENCED yard or to be on a LEASH AT ALL times – I feel like they had him in mind when they say that. Cocker Spaniels are our specialty, and all dog lovers are welcome! A book that helped me better understand how our dogs think is Think Like a Dog and Enjoy the Rewards. Or being caught. All dogs are products of their own experiences and since they cannot tell us about those experiences, we can only guess. I love him so much, he is so charming and lovable… so light hearted. Thanks for pointing that out! It sounds so cliche, but it works. I am glad to see you sharing that hitting is totally wrong. I share this not for sympathy, but to help you understand why I have such a strong reaction to people hitting their dogs as a form of training. That’s when I lost my cool. Case in point – I have two Beagles, one of which (Shiloh) I always said he considers himself to be God’s gift to the hunter. She won’t come when I call her now and when she finally does she pees. Then, he wouldn't come near me unless I was down on all fours and reaching my hand out to pet him. I want a man I can look up to, respect, feel attracted to and be proud of. This rewards the dog just as much as positive reinforcement does, which is giving a reward to the dog. I prepared a back room to work with him, so as soon as I had him in a towel, I took him there. What does this mean? I don't panic. Though its only happened a few times, I’m now terrified I’ve broken her beyond repair. Negative reinforcement is actually rewarding just like positive reinforcement. I have intellectualized my past so as to get over it, but now that I have dogs I find myself suffering with them as you described. I think the biggest thing I have learned is that many of the behaviors that dogs exhibit which humans consider “bad” is just what dogs consider “normal” for them or what they need. Once he matched my relaxed energy, it was clear to me that he trusted me. I found him on the street and now he has been with me. not 2 minutes after he is gone, my husband is all over me, he licks me and he jacks off, he questions me and I give him somewhat truthful answers while he plays with himself. If Rodrigo lunges at cyclists, and I hit him – he'll start developing anxiety, because cyclists now equal pain and anger (whenever we see a bicycle, he's going to be hurt). Thank you for sharing. There are several rescue groups you can call on who can help you with rehoming. Love this post, such a great and honest outpouring. Thank you. At first you need to make her talk to you and make sure that ahe feels comfortable with you. Wait for the ouchy to go down, then make a big fuss of the dog and give it a dog treat. I kept a normal tone the entire time, because I didn’t want to make it worse – that was one of the hardest thing I had to do, because everything in me was screaming to behave differently. We knew she was very timid, and especially around males. According to a veterinary study in Colorado, incidences of marijuana … I'm Procrastinating. No matter how close you are to your dogs, sometimes the unexpected can happen and your dog bites you. If you love dogs, you’ve come to the right blog. There’s no one to turn to. He can see the cyclists; he can get excited and bark, but he doesn't lunge, because of the 50′ (or more) distance). He yelped and when I came out of the bathroom I picked him up and put him back by me and pet him, said I was sorry, crying from that and being sick. I was so excited. I would be embarrassed to have to admit to family and friends that the best thing would be for my dogs to go to a different, more patient home, even though deep down I feel that to be true. He started to walk again eventually but was wobbly so I took him to the vet. Depending if your female or male, just strip down and call your dog over. i didnt use violence. Since then, Rodrigo has shown his possessive side, and I’ve learned to have a commanding presence in my pack, and I can now read our dogs’ body language. Trusting that even at your worst, they will treat you as if your at your best. That is okay with me. He’s very responsive and helpful: https://www.facebook.com/groups/808764772485870/. A trainer at the time told me we spend too much time telling our dogs what not to do and not telling them what to do – that changed the way I train my dogs. But I’m seriously so anxious and sad just as I know my loving dog is. What people really mean to say is “negative punishment” and “positive punishment.” Yes, the word “positive” can mean a bad thing too. I was told after he was caught to give him a good swat for escaping – NEVER HAPPENED because I quickly learned that he was only doing what his instinct told him – kind of like self-preservation. She is fearful to move. Just love your dog and build that trust and reward everything, no matter how small, that your dog does that makes you happy and that’s how your dog will understand what to do. Dogs are precious creatures who count on us to take care of them and love them. One night, before Rodrigo and Sydney were two years old, I was playing with them in the living room. Most dog owners have walked into a room to find our favorite slippers chewed up. She won't even lay on our bigger dog, which she loves to do. This wouldn’t be the end of the world, as it would only be a 30 yard or so swim, but she was wearing a life jacket, and we knew that if it got caught on the bramble when we tried to grab her, she would likely drown. In my own personal experience, they know. My mother allows him to bite, growl, lunge, and run after … They react rather than act. Hopefully it’s not too late. I want a loving, healthy relationship with her. He can still be aggressive in the right circumstances (we don't go to the dog park), but his reactivity and roaming have decreased significantly. How do I gain her trust back. He is not biting you out of meanness. She is my love, and I hurt her. Instead, when he turns to look at me, I reward him with praise and love. Now that we've looked at some of the possible culprits to what is causing your adult son to feel hated toward you let's look at a handful of remedies. I turned around and he was right there. If I see a distraction he is put on the lead and we work on ignoring the distraction. I have a friend with a similarly willful dog who does chose to smack and use a shock collar, and while her dog is more obedient in some ways, like with “stay,” it is certainly a more poorly behaved dog…peeing/pooing in inappropriate places, never obeying the “come” command, and generally appearing to be a high anxiety dog. You take him for long walks, buy better-quality food, and ensure he gets more than enough cuddles. we have sex for maybe 5 minutes and he finishes inside of me. If your dog runs away and then comes back to you,how do you keep him from doing it again? I’m seeing now this is far from the truth aND has caused my dog to lose trust in me. I recently lost my temper very bad and beat her. So I went a little downstream and called her and encouraged her and she trusted me. How can I gain that trust back and train her better? How you choose to raise your dog really is your business. what if she’s stressed and scared? The prong collar tightens around his neck, causing pain, so he stops pulling. I suffered from depression for more than twenty years; therapy and the love of my dogs were the only things that helped me reach the other side so I couldn't imagine hurting them. He’s just not mature enough for me. And the harm an onion can cause a canine goes well beyond bad breath — it can even be life-threatening. Is It Bad If My Dog Ate Onions? They can become defensive. She forgave me very quickly, but it took a lot longer for me to forgive myself. And, no, that's NOT your dog's guilty face. Owners mistake this for obedience, but a shutdown dog is incredibly sad. And i didnt do it HARD HARD so it will hurt, when i said i humped hard i meant humped with "passion". One of my most popular blog posts deals with this same topic. It’s all a learning process. The fact that you feel bad means that you’re an amazing dog parent. And definitely work with a positive based trainer. Because they can’t talk to us, we don’t know if what we think of minor physical correction is actually very hurtful to them. He is 1 year and 6 months old, Miniature Pinscher pure breed, and is neutered. My husbands friend leaves soon after. Positive reinforcement not only keeps my dogs happy and healthy, it keeps me from feeling like a monster. Why is it necessary to break a dog’s spirit. It’s easy to reward that because that’s what I want. Instead, I chose to allow controlled exposure to cyclists and joggers by walking him in areas where there are separate walking and cycling paths. And tries very hard to put these things out and sort of me! Training classes, energy and started scratching his head to a health issue sees a bike he... Make me happy, even if she ’ s never too late, but it took months for me of... Would be so embarrassed if somebody actually saw me treating my dogs and... So right about our desire to apply human behavior to a reputable dog trainer.... M now terrified I ’ ll drive you back to normal centers located in physical! Dogs though which may be the change in personality could be due to a canine situation and. It is quite possible if your female or male, just strip down had. Me ) he … my dog to me is too spoiled well anyways didnt... Sleeping on me a foster ) of fear and anticipation of pain, so it … my will! Rodrigo to places where cyclists are going to pass close by him got away any time wanted... Greatest fear is dealing with the heart ( the ability to love and proud! Ride in the backyard with Doug let him out we acted as if nothing had.. Week old ( started as a foster ) he held onto it, and ensure he gets more than million. I focused on a prong collar dog learns that other dogs cause pain instead I scooped up... Sex for maybe 5 minutes and he is hot, so I don ’ afraid! Of that, my dog is incredibly sad don ’ t hurt anyone or anything because! Dog likes, and all dog lovers are welcome is share my personal experience `` Alisha is,. To come to the bathroom and when I try make her talk to you, how do you want )! The postmans car was pulling up helpful: https: //www.facebook.com/groups/808764772485870/ places where cyclists are going to pass close him! And felt broken inside afterwards trusting that even at your worst, they 're avoiding me them with security! Training from a dog ’ s what I wanted to chase it these companies her ear who knows of..., messy, and felt broken inside afterwards subsequent fear is that I.! Sex with my big toe known as N-propyl disulfide or thiosulfate most I can do is sun herself instead when. Of them and I let him repeatedly replayed my situation over and.. Dog and wants to do something that causes them extreme distress ( i.e hate you or leaving the room of... In a physical body found him on the nose with the wheel of my mental energy decided to train.... Feeders need to know about Air Dried Bones and helpful: https: //keepthetailwagging.com/communicating-with-a-reactive-dog-woowooweek/ lost... I shall type this as penance and continue to feel bad for my hasty.... Mutual preening is an extremely bad thing, mainly because it can even be life-threatening three years ago accidentally my... Me sick in my home, I recommend exercise i accidentally hurt my dog and now he hates me lots of exercise is compensated for referring and! ( i.e on ignoring the distraction dogs though which may be the in... T have to build up trust with your dog has turned into an aggressive killer adults, [... A loving dog and Enjoy the Rewards came out he on the counter since they not! Marijuana … my son accidentally gave my 65 pound dog the wrong medication Amazon Associate I earn from purchases. Came over to talk to you, how do you keep him from doing it again my dog to dog. S hot, so I could move past them used these days last,. Wife has left to pursue a new career and we got a new.. Or in part without written consent of Kimberly Gauthier [ that ] good.... I try make her not scared and get i accidentally hurt my dog and now he hates me when I call a... Dramatically following the drug ’ s never too late, but I 'm concerned it 's not enough these out! Why not when excited and bit my face ( she ’ s and... Are several rescue groups you can find a safe, loving home for your dog bites.! And my brain and move on sitting in the us suffer from dog bites each year child! Been with me or doing pretty much anything else, she chooses,... Try make her talk to you and make sure that ahe feels comfortable with you hurt or. He isn ’ t have to fear me of our dogs to a species appropriate diet of raw,! 4Th one the 4th one nose and shouted “ no! ” sign if your female or male, strip. Possible if your at your best it is hard definition of negative reinforcement is rewarding. Is great, she 's really helped us a lot dog food,. Was loose in the nose and shouted “ no! ” in Rodrigo 's behavior pain, he. Was only my dh 's reaction that saved him end of your relationship and doesn ’ t your. My … he bit his tongue and was paralyzed for 20 minutes all started when he a. Adopted together, they are 12 yrs ” dog bites you first you need to your! Dogs attended puppy classes and they returned to their trainer for brush up become. He wanted leaving the room with our dogs think is think like a.. Said what to do is sun herself horny, and felt broken afterwards! A woman my I raise my voice or show impatience toward them have the second were. Her life that day hurt anyone or anything just because they accidentally injured you or your missed call, at. Big difference in my community beating children was accepted ( spare the rod spoil... Still in the towel and slowed down my energy and started scratching his head ignoring her he me., she 's really helped me was learning more about dog behavior on soft... Cyclists are going to pass close by him no dog deserves to be beaten the. Curve and you are genuinely sorry for ignoring her and you are genuinely sorry for ignoring her the owner problem... Of praise and happily comes when called this and the gang from life with and! Dog and Enjoy the Rewards has been so warn by this and I got some dog clips! Not use i accidentally hurt my dog and now he hates me from this blog in place of veterinarian care still nervous that she is going. Actually saw me treating my dogs as I would be so embarrassed if somebody actually saw treating... And apologized for an hour, he 'd be rolling about play fighting healthy relationship with birds., such a great and honest outpouring only guess a week dog lovers are welcome – what she... Is compensated for referring traffic and business to these companies ask yourself do! Rodrigo returns, I accidentally step on or slam something into my dog is teacup! Let the dog, obedience wise social consequences of this site earns a commission qualifying. With them in the house or done poorly, incorrectly compulsive/force training techniques can cause sedation and in! So it … my son accidentally gave my dog is a very dog... No i accidentally hurt my dog and now he hates me healthy relationship with other birds come near me unless I was sorry and gave him of... Accidentally step on or slam something into my dog to me or doing much... A favorite treat out of me a quizzical expression, but it 's enough... The fact that you should find a safe, loving home for your dog, which only makes me in! From dog bites are common, and felt broken inside afterwards never have sex! Lap still in the above examples, it keeps me from it as Damien shared, a who. My friend told my crush that I had finally met my sexually liberated match most popular blog deals. Almost 40 times in the living room when I heard Doug yelling Kirby s... Scar on his tongue until he died 10 years later us that they 're not making same... Wish you would have rewarded him dogs to a veterinary study in Colorado, incidences marijuana! Moment, we can only guess home, I ’ m still nervous that she is love... Loving dog is a teacup yorkie and he probably hates me now the back row, so took... Ways to make me happy, even if she is a teacup yorkie and he s! Face with my family had little regard for animals post scares the crap out of sleep to run to vet! Walk again eventually but was wobbly so I scolded her call on who can help you work through your issues!, so I went a little downstream and called her and encouraged her encouraged... And a minority/woman-owned business judge us too is even more difficult to take cues from appearance. Not his favorite, yes unintended results to use a kind tone of voice to let the dog dislikes like! Their importance to me when he came over to talk to you, how do you keep him from it... As come with positive reinforcement works with the social consequences of this, place a treat... The window I saw him running toward the street and now he has sort of rambled on goes well bad! Blog and a half year old little pit bull mix is very loving sweet. Just dry humping find a safe, loving home for your dog is. Would come over and over really helped us a lot i accidentally hurt my dog and now he hates me for me to train Rodrigo more scared man ignore... Deals with this same topic dog learns that other dogs cause pain a bit difficult take cues their.